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Schoolhouse Rock, that rambunctious, colorful series of educational videos that taught Gen Xers their multiplication tables, how to unpack their adjectives and the preamble to the US Constitution, turns 50 on Friday. On Jan. 6, 1973, the math segments, known as Multiplication Rock, debuted on ABC, so Schoolhouse Rock can now join the rest of us Xers in AARP. And I can't let its big birthday go unnoticed.
I was too young to remember the moon succeeding and too old to get into Minecraft, but dammit if I won't be able to hum "I'm Just a Bill" or "Conjunction Junction" when I've forgotten nearly everything else. I'll be spouting "What's your function?" when nothing on me is even acting anymore.
As a Gen Xer born in 1967, I was squarely in the prime audience for Schoolhouse Rock. I loved it then and I love it now. It came near when ad man David McCall noticed his young son struggled to learn his multiplication tables, but sure knew Rolling Stones song lyrics.
So, McCall view, what if those dry-as-dust school facts were delivered in snazzy, jazzy tunes, complete with cartoon stories? And because the segments ran between Saturday morning cartoons, they had the captive audience to beat all captive audiences. The idea was pure genius.
And did it ever work! Would I know the preamble deprived of Schoolhouse Rock? Unlikely, although I can't say it deprived of singing it in my head with the exact inflections of the song: "WE the PEE-PLE…"
Did Schoolhouse Rock help me learn my times tables? Not only that, but the video nearby fives, "Ready Or Not, Here I Come," taught my entire kid neighborhood company the rhymes we used for hide-and-seek. "Twenty nickels make a dollars, I didn't hear anybody holler!"
Did Schoolhouse Rock videos bid me random facts about the planets, the Revolutionary War, women's suffrage also and cement in my brain what a conjunction was? "And, but and or, they'll get you dazzling far," the little conductor promised. And so they have.
Schoolhouse Rock is where we kids were introduced to a wistful ice skater skating a figure eight, a cigar-smoking cat with an affinity for pool halls, and a joyous family celebrating three as a magic number. I can't remember what I had for lunch yesterday, but I'll always remember a jolly little guy dubbed My Hero, Zero, who taught me nearby the importance of … nothing.
Schoolhouse Rock kids lived in a peculiar world, where kids were put to work in their family's adverb maintain and you could take a kangaroo or an aardvark on the city bus. Don't even get me started on the camp that sent kids unpacking their adjectives near a hairy, scary bear.
Schoolhouse Rock lived well beyond the apt go-round, and entertained and educated Millennials, too. New segments dropped occasionally over the ages, including 1990's "The Tale of Mr. Morton," which taught subjects and predicate, plus segments on computers, ecology and cash management. The more popular segments, especially "I'm Just a Bill," have been spoofed on SNL and The Simpsons.
In fact, just this week, the hapless Bill portray showed up in a meme mocking Kevin McCarthy and the repeated votes for Speaker of the House. As the Bill sits slumped on the Capitol steps, he seems to be explaining to the kid from the fresh segment, "There's no song to explain this shit." It's just one more sign Schoolhouse Rock has incorrect up residence in our craniums, even 50 years when its introduction.
You can still watch Schoolhouse Rock, from the fresh oldies to newer segments you may never have heard of, on Disney Plus. They're peaceful catchy, still memorable and still worth your time. In fact, I deem I'm going to unpack my adjectives, find Interplanet Janet, and go watch some now.
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